February 27, 2010

• I tell you this in confidence

  Your confidence will determine your results… as long as someone faster, stronger or better than you doesn't show up.

February 7, 2010

• We aren't number one!

  "Winning isn't everything," said whats-his-name, the guy who came in 2nd.

January 18, 2010

• I'm trying, really I… okay, never mind

  Never try your best. That way, when things don't work out, you can comfort yourself by remembering that you didn't try your best.

December 29, 2009

• Oh sure it seems obvious NOW

  Last year, my confusion made me bankrupt when I mistakenly opened a Frozen Yoga store.

December 26, 2009

• Can you hold this for me while I climb?

  Nobody climbs the ladder of success alone. Without others, we'd have no rungs to step on.

December 11, 2009

• The REAL secret to success

  To achieve success, nothing in the world can take the place of persistence, determination, & marrying into a wealthy family.

December 2, 2009

• I think I can think I can't

  Never think "I won't succeed" since there are so many other more interesting thoughts on the way to inevitable failure.

October 15, 2009

• Oh, oh, I'm only $10k away from bliss!

  Money will not make you happy. But all the stuff you can buy with it can sure getcha pretty close.

October 5, 2009

• I wouldn't admit that

  Admitting defeat doesn't mean you're weak. It means you're strong enough to face the truth. Wetting your pants, on the other hand…

September 28, 2009

• Ah the sound of (golden) wedding bells

  If you want massive, immediate success, ask yourself these 4 questions: Who? Can? I? Marry?

September 20, 2009

• What if I'm dreaming of my dwelling failing?

  Don't dwell on your ideas about why something may not work, since things will fail for reasons you never dreamed of, anyway.

July 30, 2009

• Somebody is a nobody

  Nobody is born a loser. It takes years to mature into that, and decades to master.

July 27, 2009

• I'm a poor one, so pour one

  I dared to be rich. But the Universe double-dog dared me to be poor. How could I say no to a double-dog dare?!

July 12, 2009

• Whack-a-dude

  Standing up every time you're knocked down tells the Universe that haven't learned to duck.

July 9, 2009

• I messed up this post

  There's no such thing as failure. There's only defeat, fiasco, flopping, losing, screwing up, imploding, going bust, the opposite of success…

June 22, 2009

• I'm concerned about my lack of concern

  Do your work without concern for results.
  Since the results will probably suck, there's no need to make it worse by getting your panties in a twist.

May 31, 2009

• I'm playing the lottery tonight

  You must put 100% effort into every endeavor. Otherwise, how will you learn that success is 99% luck?

May 24, 2009

• Come on lucky 10,0001

  If it takes 10,000 failures before you find success, then, holy smokes, did you luck out at the end!

May 17, 2009

• What if I try to fail?

  If you do not try, you cannot fail.
  Plus, you have the added bonus of the story about what you could have done had you tried.

May 14, 2009

• Same ole', same ole'

  What would you do today if you knew, absolutely, 100%, that you couldn't succeed?