March 5, 2010
- I love the word livid
I'm livid about becoming totally free of anger!
February 25, 2010
- Even if you give 110%
Life is 10% what happens, and 90% what I think should have happened instead.
February 10, 2010
- That's life
Life is not about whether you slip and fall, but whether, when you do, that someone caught it on camera and put it on Youtube.
February 2, 2010
- Expressionism
Life is too short to live with pent up anger. Sit quietly with each person you're angry with, look them gently in the eyes, and let them know how much you really hate them.
January 29, 2010
- I was Punk'dy Brewstered
There are no accidents, you're just being punk'd by the universe!
January 5, 2010
- I want whirled peas
As you try to complete the puzzle that is this world, remember: Be the piece you're looking for.
December 23, 2009
- Actually, no need to wait
Service is the highest purpose of our life. Once you truly understand that, fetch me some Haagen-Dazs and massage my feet.
December 17, 2009
- Effin' ef F-word
A smart person knows the best thing to say.
A wise person knows when adding the f-word improves it.
December 13, 2009
- I'm weigh more of myself
I'm trying to be more of the man I know I can be.
That's why I put butter on everything.
December 3, 2009
- I'm determined
In this life, I'm just riding the train of fate, hoping to arrive at my predestination shortly.
November 29, 2009
- Lemon water is still sour
Life gave me lemons… but I'm all out of sugar. So, now what?
November 23, 2009
- Can you spell faleure?
In the school of life, I just walked in late for a pop quiz in a class I've been skipping.




