March 11, 2010

• Life in Bob Tzu's world

  People ask, "What's it like to be a Duhism Master?"
  Well, maybe this video — the view from my meditation room — will answer that:

March 1, 2010

• Positively iffy

  I have such mixed feelings about my absolute certainty.

February 6, 2010

• Maybe it's the shoes

  Bob Tzu wants to know: Does this ass make my pants look big?

February 1, 2010

• I'm just sayin'

  Bob to a student: "Pardon me if I sound condescending. It's just that my blood sugar is low… and I think you're an idiot."

January 31, 2010

• Oh where oh where has it gone

  Sadly, I've been using it, but I'm still losing it.

January 24, 2010

• Don't know much about history

  Tonight I'm curling up with my cousin Sunny Tzu's other book, The Art History of War.

January 10, 2010

• Where's my wallet?!

  I said to Jesus, "Sure, you can get away with teaching 'Seek and ye shall find,' because they haven't invented car keys and eye glasses yet.

January 1, 2010

• What every dog dreams of

  The present we got for our dog, Petting Tzu:

December 25, 2009

• Bobbie Sue Tzu knows how to shop

  Look at the present Bobbie Sue Tzu got me! (turn on the captions)

December 5, 2009

• What's that semi-sweet ringing noise I hear?

  My baking is like poetry. You should try my "Ask not for whom the bell tollhouse cookies."

November 28, 2009

• Now that's a tasty treat for the mind

  As a philosopher, for holiday parties I like to bring an enigma wrapped in a paradox wrapped in bacon.

November 13, 2009

• Very, very

  My uniqueness is very one-of-a-kind.

November 5, 2009

• How sweat it is

  I have a special antiperspirant for when I'm sweating the small stuff.

October 31, 2009

• I'll go with "trick"

  On Halloween, I always go out dressed as my Authentic Self. Nobody recognizes me.

October 19, 2009

• Uh, oh, there are plumbing problems, too.

  My body is like a dwelling and I am merely renting it for this lifetime.
  Now, who do I call about this gas leak?

October 6, 2009

• Just not phone, electric, gas, water…

  I welcome change.
  But I prefer bills.

September 8, 2009

• Help find Fluffy

  Can you help find our dog Petting Tzu's friend, Fluffy?

• I'll be reborn again, again

  I hope to be reincarnated as a past-life insurance salesman.

September 5, 2009

• Lucky I have past-life insurance

  Going to the emergency room… slipped off the ladder while reaching for enlightenment.

September 2, 2009

• 'course, success doesn't move me either

  My failures do not discourage or upset me. Thank you, Prozac!